#8 Practice Democratic Principles

In life, I have always seemed to hang out with the people that seem to be most like me. People who share similar interests or beliefs as I do. It is so much easier to connect with these people in life, as we do not have to try to find similarities between us; they just come naturally. While at Hesston College, I really seemed to connect with the people that were in my mod. Everyone in there was a white male, coming from a Mennonite background. That is, everyone except for two young Muslims from Kenya. This made it very easy for me to make friends with the majority of my mod mates, yet, leaving a little bit of a difficult time making friends with the Kenyans. We had to TRY to become friends, it wasn't something that just sparked with them. We soon overcame our differences and now I keep in contact with these fine young men as well. Out of the seven men in my mod, four of us are now attending Goshen College together. Therefore, our friendship has continued to flourish as we try to see each other and "kick it" every day together. These friendships will be cherished for the rest of my life. So would I be one that is considered hard to become friends with unless you are a white, mennonite male? Generally, I think the answer most people would give to me would be yes. Just looking me, most people think I am a stuck up individual, just judging me from the scowl on my face. It is just how my face was made. People think I am upset or mad, yet, once they get to know me they understand that is just how I am.

While growing up, I was one known for making jokes, whether they were appropriate or inappropriate, I always seemed to have a joke of some sort. Many time I would have jokes about homosexuals, races, or even the opposite sex. Not to thrilled about my past and the jokes I told, it is a fact that I was always telling some pretty bad ones that I would never want to be told about me. Joking is something that can be done if the people involved and listening all know that it is being considered a joke. However, sometimes people hear a joke and take it the wrong way, even though the "comedian" telling the joke did not mean it in a negative way whatsoever. Going to college and maturing has helped me get away from the past that had the potential to get injured severely if a joke was told to the wrong person. With going to college, I have become friends with people who help me in this journey away from the joke-telling. Now, when I hear these jokes that I once told, it is like I have the angel and devil cartoons on my shoulder trying to tell me what to do: either join in the fun, or stick up for the people being made fun of. Most the time, it seems easier to join in, yet, recently I have really been working on doing what right, and the feelings I receive when I make the right choice feels so good when everything is over and done with.

Finally, listening to discussion in classroom has helped me learn who speaks up in a classroom, which I think will really help me when I try to devise questions to ask in my classroom, trying to get everyone involved in the conversation. From what I can tell, (from the classes that I am in right now at Goshen College, and the classes that I have observed at Goshen Middle School and Elkhart Memorial High School) those who speak up are generally (from the knowledge that I have of their family life learned from others or the teachers) the boys who have a father in their life. At Goshen Middle School, it is very apparent who has a good family life, as they seem to be involved in the assignments and discussions, and willing to help others out. Other kids seem worried about possibly what is going on at home or what they might be eating that day. I feel so bad for these kids because they do not feel like they can be involved in the discussion because most of the questions do not seem to relate to them, such as: What did your family do this weekend? Some responses from those that volunteer are, "my parents and I went to the zoo, or we went to the Notre Dame game as a family." However, when the teacher calls on one being shy, they usually seem to say, "I went to my dad's house and watched TV the whole weekend", or "I went to visit my dad in jail." Hardly ever do you hear, "Me and my dad went fishing this weekend! It was so fun!"
These responses really make me feel bad for these children, making me anxious to get into the classroom and be a male figure in their lives.